I recently fell into a state of self-conscious despair as I continually compared myself to so many other girls in terms of appearance and acomplishments. I equated my self worth to the number of likes I got on an IG post because I knew I wouldn’t meet a high amount and I would have an excuse to feel sorry for myself.
And to an extent, I think we all default to this at points in our lives. I wanted to stop myself from these thoughts in the future, so I wrote a letter to myself.
I have been writing letters to different future selves for when I get engaged or when my first child graduates from high school as part of my effort to take care of myself. Last night, however, I thought about writing to myself going through bad times, and I think it could really help.
These kind of “letters from the past” don’t have to be opened during milestones, but moments of weakness: when you’re in a creative slump, you can’t find beauty in yourself, you lose a loved one, etc.
Included in my particular letter that sparked this blog post, I put a list of things that would help me calm down when I did read my letter. A few of them included:
• writing/drawing/creating something just to clear my mind of negativity
• listening to music (I included a playlist to listen to)
• putting on makeup or an outfit that embodies the person you want to be (Of course, you can do this alone if it’s judgement you fear. I thought this would be a good idea to help get a sense of the things I actually wanted to see within myself.)
• Learn something new by going on youtube or a favorite blog.
• Go on tumblr or pinterest and find your favorite things. Try to avoid IG or twitter, as the could make you feel less of yourself again.
• talking to a close sibling or friend. I did this with a really close friend last night at 12 am and although there was a part that she disagreed on, I didn’t feel angry like I would’ve been a few moths ago. In fact, my friend, if you’re reading this, I would love to hear your ideas on how you would better word what I stated 💖
• Drink water, take a hot shower, treat yourself to a night in.
It’s really up to you on what you could do to make you feel happy. What matters is that you feel better when you finish writing, and you feel better in the future when you finish reading.
I hope you all know that your self worth should be determined by other’s perceptions of you. You are capable of amazing things and I hope everything works out for you!